U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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