@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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