is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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