I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Come see our sink grown plant.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
