I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
