Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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