it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
