He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
