I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
