Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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