Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
