i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
