i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
