and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize