You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
