saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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