Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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