She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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