I got chris browned last night
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
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