What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Fuck appropriateness.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
