i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
