no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
