is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
