I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize