i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
