i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
