I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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