You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
