I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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