The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
