Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
