I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
