Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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