doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
