every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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