No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize