Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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