There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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