LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
