Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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