is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
