I want to stick my p in your. b.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
