worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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