your thong is hanging out like whoa
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
