And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
