he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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