i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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