I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize