sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
