the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
